Olympians' Trial: Dionysus
Content[edit | edit source]
One of the transcripts of the Trial of the Olympians that decided Asterion's fate.
Dionysus, God of Wine, voted in favor of Asterion.
"Owl, Asterion's my brother-in-law. There's no way I'm going with this plan of yours.
But since we're on the topic of eternal punishment, throw Theseus, the impudent bitch, to eternal damnation instead: just reward."
After a brief interval during which Lady Athena suggested a location wherein to store and ferment grapes, Dionysus was asked by Lord Zeus to offer a more polite vote.
"Bright-Eyed Athena, my dearest cousin, as always your words were sweeter than the finest wines, but exceptionally I have little wish of inebriating myself with what you have to say.
The Asterion you speak of is my brother-in-law, do you ignore this fact? If that was not enough, the hero you so favored, Theseus of Athens, he left my neat-ankled Ariadne stranded on an island to die. I must thank the Fates, for by their fortune I happened to be passing by and rescued her.
I see no reason to support your plea. My dear cousin, this punishment you propose for the hybrid boy, I would never impose such a wretched fate on any family member. Is it not enough that he's in Hades now?
Settle down, I say. Have a drink, cousin. This wrath in your brow is temporary, a good jar of wine would vanquish it overnight. And that is the same gift I would offer to the Cretan prince; if it were up to me I would make sure his existence is gifted only with the greatest wine to bring solace to his spirit."
Trivia[edit | edit source]
- If the player background is Speedrunner, an additional phrase is added to the transcript.
- The addition reads: "Also: Fornicate Theseus. That cunt."